The Grief of Losing Him….

No one tells you how much the teen years will hurt your heart
They grow up so fast….
Simplistic words that seem so futile when you’re up to your elbows in a shit filled nappy, or when your eyes are glazing over as they describe their latest Minecraft creation. When the days are long and the nights, at times even longer, it is tempting to look ahead to when it will be “easier”.
My baby just turned 15….
The first of three boys, he and I have always been close. Two peas in a pod and all that, our relationship is generally one of ease; we just get each other.
Three months ago, I had a child that would lean into me. He would sit on me jokingly and refuse to get off until I cuddled him. We could talk about anything and his room was used for nothing more than sleep and playing his Playstation.
My baby just turned 15… and the grief is often palpable.
Change is inevitable, we all know that but it doesn’t make it any easier. His growing up, is an immense source of pride and joy. I love seeing him with his friends, the wonderful wings of independence that he has grown.
My baby just turned 15….
The other night he was at a sleepover and texted me saying “Good night mum” and when he came home, I was the first one to whom he came and said “Hello” ….and then he leaned, ever so slightly into me.

March 13, 2018 @ 11:25 pm
Perfectly timed and struck a heart wrenching chord within me. My son just turned 15 a month ago and your words were very painfully true. Thankyou for the reassurance that this is how other mums feel too.